Wednesday, March 28, 2012

INSOMNIA

I slid across the backseat of my girlfriends Mother's car. We were headed to band practice or 4-H, I'm not really sure where we were going. My girlfriend sat in the front seat with her Mother and barely spoke to me. I remember my thirteen or fourteen year old brain thinking, "why is she mad at me?"
Finally her Mother spoke up and said, "she suffers with insomnia".
Oh my goodness, I remember thinking, is she going to die?  
Why didn't she just say, "she can't sleep?"
Lately I've been suffering with insomnia. 
I have lots on my plate right now. A speaking engagement next week, and in a few weeks after that I am the keynote speaker at a three day retreat. So many nights I glance at the clock and it's 2:45, and I'm thinking, sure wish I could fall asleep Lord.
In the past the Lord and I have done lots of work in the middle of the night. But the past few nights, I think He's been trying to sleep (we all know He doesn't really sleep) and reminding me to do the same. He's been telling me, you need to sleep. Stop trying to figure everything out yourself.
But Lord, you know that's what I do.....try to figure things out. 
I wasn't surprised after another sleepless night He led me to this verse in Psalm. Psalm 4:8 In peace I will both lie down and sleep; for thou alone O Lord, makest me dwell in safety. 
I read in Sarah Young's Jesus Calling, While you wait in My Presence, I do My best work within you transforming you by the renewing of your mind.
My mind can't be renewed if I've had no sleep. 
I hear you Lord. 
And by the way, last night I slept like a baby while the Lord took care of all the "plans".
Jeremiah 29:11 For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future."
I'm glad He has it all figured out.
 I just need to rest now and watch His glorious plan unfold.

4 comments:

Carol J. Garvin said...

I usually get my best writing ideas in the last moments before falling asleep... those almost-but-not-quite-there times. I don't mind lying there with thoughts flittering through my mind because they don't usually keep me awake too long. It's only Wednesday nights that I have a problem. I come home from choir practice with a couple anthems running through my head like a video loop and They Will Not Stop! You may notice that I'm posting this comment after midnight PDT... there isn't much point in me going to bed early on Wednesday nights!

When I do get there I will be reciting to myself, "You will keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on you: because he trusts in you," from Isaiah 26:3. Then I'll start praying and trusting. :)

Rest well, Katt.

Kathryn Neff Perry said...

Thank you Carol. I see anthems as a way of praising the Lord. I usually have one "playing" in my head all day long. One of the things I have learned to do is just "call His Name" when I can't sleep. Sometimes I think He holds me in His arms (when I am worried) or whispers the words of a favorite hymn....the words often lull me into a peaceful sleep.
You are a forever friend....some day my prayer is that we will meet face to face. I love you.
Katt

Joylene said...

Insomnia used to freak me out when I was a young mother because it was hard enough keeping up with 5 boys. Today if I have a bout of sleeplessness, I know it's because I'm thinking too much. I just go with it and spend the following day drifting through my chores. LOL. Until the hockey game comes on, of course!

Hi Katt! Happy Weekend.

Kathryn Neff Perry said...

You always make me laugh! The hockey game......
You are so right about the "thinking too much" theory. I used to wish I had an on and off switch for my brain. But the older I get the more I realize I don't want to wish for that....my brain gets switched off more than on now! ha ha
Hugs